I absolutely CANNOT blog about my daily life. After the Teacher's Day post, I got loazy and stopped doing it. Really, I can't. I'm much more content bullshitting about whatever that pops up in my head. Have a run through what's going on in my mind now.

1. Flight of the Conchords! :D
-Foux Du Fafa(Oh ho!! Baguette!!)
-The Rhymenoceres and the Hiphopopotamus(mm...Steve...)
-Friends(If you break my dick I won't break your balls...)
-KOREAN KARAOKE!!!

2. Franz Ferdinand
-The whole damn Tonight: Franz Ferdinand album. That's baby-making music, that is.

3. Muse
-SEPTEMBER! SEPTEMBER!!

4. Bradley Cooper
-He is HOT in The Midnight Meat Train and Yes Man. Well, mainly because of his hair. I didn't like his hair in The Hangover(a must watch movie for me! :D)

5. More Bradley Cooper
-Even his name SOUNDS hot.

6. Even More Bradley Cooper
-And did I mention his stubble??

I uploaded lots of new songs into my iPod! So many that I exchanged my iPod Nano for a Mini. YES, this Mini:

I know, right? It still has a colourless screen.

Mm...Steve...

Pass the quiz to 10 ppl that you wish to know how they feel about you
1.Yi Jingla...who else??
2.Angeline Ng
3.Ghee Ken
4.Liiyung
5.Bao Jin
6.Florence
7.Darren :)
8.Jo Li
9.Josephine
10.Kimberly Tan

1.What do you think about the person who tagged you?
Darren? CUTEST GUY ON EARTH.

2.who is no.7 having relationship with?
He's having a relationship with his guitar.

3.who is no.9 having relationship with?
Er...McFly??

4.if no.9 & 1 are together,will it be a good thing?
Unless they're lesbians, yeah.

5.what about no.1 & 5?
Don't think they've met.

6.what is no.3 studying
Scrabble :]

7.when was the last time you chatted with no.6
A looong time ago D:

8.Does no.8 have any cousin(s) in his/her school.
I dunno, Jo...do you??

9.will u woo no.8?
YES!!!

10.how about no.4?
Ehh...I don't think we'd feel very comfortable about it...

11.does no.2 have any siblings?
Yeppers

12.how did you get to know about no.3?
2Batai! :D

13.No.4?
Dude, since we were seven.

14.no.7?
Math tuition, since we were 9. He was and STILL is the cutest guy!

15.no.2?
Just briefly saw each other since we were 10. I REALLY got to know her this year, and I don't regret it at all!!

16.where does no.1 live at?
Bukit Jelutong(is that spelled right?)

17.how did you get to know no.10?
What...did you fall off the face of earth? Met in kindergarten!

18.is no.5 the sexiest person in the world?
YES!!! Ahahahaha! Nahh, she's just incredibly cute and sweet and an ABSOLUTE guttermouth... ;]...kidding.

I'm going to treat this like a real blog. Writing down what REALLY happened today and not crap about other things instead. So what happened today??

We celebrated Teacher's Day in school today. I didn't want to go, but my book marks for English were at stake unless I hand in my comprehension exercise book. So I went. And then I arrived. Jing arrived at around the same time as me too, come to that. So we walked upstairs. And did you know that I seriously, seriously swear that the Form Ones are getting shorter every year. Seriously.

But I digress.

Adrian was already there with Jon Zhen and Shafiq, poring over their KGT's, so nothing much. I whipped out my camera and snapped photos like crazy.

Grace came later on.


Ahahaha!!! My very 'imaginative' friend, Angeline!!

Grace sure as hell moves quick...O_O

Soon, Jing had to go down to call her mum and to tell her about the stray RM50 note on the seat of the car, so I followed her downstairs all the while keeping my right hand in my pocket and my left hand curled into a suspicious looking fist. Why? I had painted my nails black the night before...O_O OH EM GEE! RULEBREAKER! Ahahaha...Anyway, we came back upstairs and ngam-ngam at that time, Grace and Voon Pang came, so we all walked back to class. Voon Pang was carrying this suspiciously huge paper bag. This was what it contained:

LEO UNIFORM!!

So, in typical "ShaLynn jakun" fashion, naturally we catcalled and whooped as this poor girl hurriedly puts on her heels. Yi Jing so wisely says about Voon Pang's heels, "I wanna chase Voon Pang and see how she runs in her heels! :P "

Honestly, she looks really good in her Leo uniform. I don't mean to sound like a perverted freak, but...THAT'S TIGHT.

The Well Dressed Girl.

Voon Pang was still putting on her tie when Adrian and everybody else were doing the KGT thing.

Don't ask me how Zhi Wen got in to the picture. "So..."

Then we had to go down to the Pavilion for a special assembly. Same old, same old, usual speeches and stuff. Ugh, could the Datin be any more slower in her speech. I corrected her throughout her whole speech though :) by finishing her sentences with "Bullshit" or "Bullshat" or "Boshite". This garnered many giggles. Not much, really. Teachers sang a song, la-dee-da. Then we all trooped back to class to play Chow Tai Ti, Heart Attack and jam to my iPod.

Jon Zhen! Or as Grace so affectionately calls him, "J.Z!!" :)


GRAAAACEE!!!!


You know how some bimbo bloggers tend to give names to their best friends or close friends or shit? Well, I'm very tempted to call Adrian here, Bear-bear just for the pleasure of humiliating him. >:)


BEAR-BEAR!


Chow Tai Ti: The staple card game of all (most) Chinese.


Think I was belting The Killers at the time.







CHOA TAI TI! The staple card game of all Chinese. Well, most anyway.


Zhong Yuen stowing away in 3 Batai!


See? Black nails! And a Zhong Yuen interested in an iPod Mini D: !






DARREN!! MY...uh...[insert humiliating name here]!!


[Insert humiliating name here] is fooling around with me bottle for no apparent reason!!

P.S. This is not a complete post. Please come back as I will edit it.

Paramore has a new album coming out at the end of summer, eh?

Hah!

Good luck trying to compete with Muse, boys(and girl)!!!

Dad just let one rip in the House of God House of Internet, Computers and All Things Technologically Holy. Attempts to search for a piece of cloth or anything worth filtering the air are have proven futile. I am gagging and choking slowly to my inevitable olfactory demise. I think I smell some bodily-processed cucumbers...

Poetry At Its Best

Poems are like this,
They have no rhythm or anything.
Well, the supposedly
Good poems anyway.
These supposedly good poems
Are like broken up sentences.
This blog post is nought,
But the sentences broken up
To make it look very deep and poetic.
Also, poems like these...
They don't care for punctuation.
See how at the start of every sentence
The first letter has been capitalized,
Even when it's NOT supposed to be
Capitalized.
I can go on like this all day
And sound very deep and soulful in my words.
With poems like these,
Who says it's necessary for them to rhyme?
Poems can be about anything,
I figured.
Just get your damned inspiration
From the first thing you see.
Tulips! Pencils! Telephones!
Magnets! And whatever miscellaneous objects.
Poems like these,
They also have verses with just a
Word.
See what I
Mean?
Poems written in this fashion,
are pointless.
And very much ridiculous.
Unless someone can point out its
Unridiculousness,
I take back what I say.
Quoting a message tee,
"Shakespeare hates
Your emo poems."
The emo poems are along the lines,
Of this format.
I have something better
To do now.
So I will leave and not linger
Upon
This subject any longer.
Good bye.

Sincerest Apologies.

Ah, my sincerest apologies for leaving this blog as 'dead'. However, rest assured that there will be updates sporadically.

Remember, I said sporadically.

Misquotations #3

This was not an accidental wordplay. Nay, it was a pun intended.

So I was talking to a friend. He was making puns. And I replied, "Yeesh. I don't like nut puns. Don't ever let me cashew making one."

Geddit?!?=D

Alas, it isn't so funny now that it's being published, but in the good words of Kimberley Tan:
*gigglegigglesnortsnort*

FINALLY!

Here is an excerpt from a Wikipedia article on Muse:

"As of February 2, 2009 Muse has already made it into the studio and begun recording at least one song for their upcoming album. On microcuts.net, a news headline has stated that the album is slated for a September 2009 release"

Perfect! By the time PMR is over, I can rush over to the nearest Rock Corner and get it!

But of course, if you want to save me the trouble and money...*ahem*

I Went Off To See...KitaroLiveInGenting!

I did, really. I did catch Kitaro live in Genting. For someone who looks like a hermit, he certainly has a lot of pent-up energy. My favourite bit was when the management requested that everybody put away their cameras and other recording devices for the enjoyment of others. And would you know it, barely 5 minutes into the concert, everbody whipped out their handphones, camcorders, cameras and snapped away like nobody's business.

God, I love Malaysia.

Hand At Haiku #2

The hols are over,
My giblets are quivering,
Waiting for next week.

Misquotations #2

On the way to school, it got really quiet in the car with mum. As we were driving, we whizzed past the recently opened Giant Hypermarket in Kota Damansara. In a lame attempt to make small talk, I said this, "Giant is really big, eh?"

Misquotations #1

This may be one of my new series of blog posts...Okay, maybe NOT series, but there'll be some posts with the title, "Misquotations #2/3/4..." and so on and so forth. So, this is my "Misquotations" series, when sometimes you really need to think before you speak.

Right, on with the post.

So during class, this huge-as bee came flying through the window. Naturally, this would cause some pandemonium especially among the girls and the more rowdier boys whose interest is to shoot it down. As class monitor*ahem*, I felt it my duty to keep order in the class. I got up and yelled, "Everybody calm down! Leave it alone and it won't harm you! Please! Leave it BEE!"

(An average "Misquotations" post will be something like that involving really weird wordplay.)

Fairytale Endings Aren't Real. They Exist To Give Us Fantasies That Will Never Come True. . .And Subsequently Break Our Hearts.

*giggle*Sorry...couldn't resist.

The Mathematics of Life

Give me 3 days to recover from a sore-throat,
One sleepover with a best friend,
And one outing with two best friends.

What do you get?
. . .
. . .
A sore-throat.

Greeting from Sha Lynn's house.

We're still waiting for Senor Cockroach(that's Siew Keong to you!)to come 0ut from under the bed. He's hiding there like the snivelly little coward he is.

You Google Staff Are Mean

*clackety-clackety-clack*
Your search - "wooden gift wrapper organizer" - did not match any documents

Did you mean: "wooden gift wrap organizer"

*clicks on "wooden gift wrap organizer"*

. . .
. . .
Your search - "wooden gift wrap organizer" - did not match any documents.


Why, oh why do you torture me so, Google Image Search?
How have you known that I had to do my Living Skills documentation?

Colourful Terms for the Colourful Student

In an effort to prevent myself from using curse words like damn, shit and in more extreme cases, f-[expletive], I, with help from Yi Jing, have come up with a list of more colourful and cute terms so as not to set fire to your neighbour and his cat with such foul-mouthed...ness.

Colourful, Cute, Curses(CCC to you):
Darn
Smokes!
Stoo-pard
Piffles
Snerk!
Purpley-blue!
Peaches and cream!(fine, Kenneth Parcell helped a bit, too...)

Well, there you have it. Can't say that it's rather clever nor cute. But, as a good neighbour, I believe it's my absolute duty to not set fire to the neighbour and his cat with my foul-mouthed...ness.

The Endless Possibilites of A BM Karangan.

So I was surfing the internet a lil', poking around here and there...watching Scrubs videos on YouTube(or as Beatrice so aptly puts it:KamuTube) and so on and so forth. I didn't know what the hell I was typing on Google, but I came across this BM essay in some website. Said to be the best BM essay ever and most likely will earn a definite 'A' for UPSR. This essay was written by a prodigal 10 year old and goes like this:


Pagi itu pagi minggu. Cuaca cukup sejuk sehingga mencapai takat suhu beku. Sebab itu saya tidak mandi pagi sebab air kolah jadi air batu dan air paip tidak mahu keluar sebab beku di dalam batang paip. Pagi itu saya bersarapan dengan keluarga di dalam unggun api kerana tidak tahan sejuk. Selepas itu emak saya mengajak saya menemaninya ke pasar. Tetapi saya tidak mahu.

Selepas emak menikam perut saya berkali-kali dengan garfu barulah saya bersetuju untuk mengikutnya. Kami berjalan sejauh 120 kilometer kerana pasar itu letaknya 128 kilometer dari rumah. Lagi 8 kilometer nak sampai pasar saya ternampak sebuah lori kontena meluru dengan laju dari arah belakang.

Dia melanggar emak saya. Emak saya tercampak ke dalam gaung. Dia menjerit “Adoi!”. Lepas itu emak saya naik semula dan mengejar lori tersebut. Saya pun turut berlari di belakang emak saya kerana takut emak saya melanggar lori itu pula. Pemandu lori itu nampak kami mengejarnya. Dia pun memecut lebih laju iaitu sama dengan kelajuan cahaya. Kami pula terpaksa mengejar dengan lebih laju iaitu sama dengan dua kali ganda kelajuan cahaya. Emak saya dapat menerajang tayar depan lori itu. Lori itu terbabas dan melanggar pembahagi jalan lalu bertembung dengan sebuah feri. Feri itu terbelah dua.

Penumpang feri itu yang seramai 100 orang semuanya mati. Pemandu feri itu sangat marah. Dia pun bertukar menjadi Ultraman dan memfire pemandu lori. Pemandu lori menekan butang khas di dalam lori dia..lori itu bertukar menjadi robot Transformer. Mereka bergaduh di udara. Emak saya tidak puas hati. Dia pun terus menyewa sebuah helikopter di Genting
Highlands dan terus ke tempat kemalangan. Dia melanggar pemandu feri yang telah bertukar menjadi Ultraman itu.

Pemandu feri itu terkejut dan terus bertukar menjadi pemandu feri semula lalu terhempas ke jalanraya. Pemandu feri itu pecah. Pemandu lori sangat takut melihat kejadian itu. Dia meminta maaf dari emak saya. Dia menghulurkan tangan ingin bersalam. Tetapi emak saya masih marah. Dia menyendengkan helikopternya dan mengerat tangan pemandu lori itu dengan kipas helikopter. Pemandu lori itu menjerit “Adoi..!” dan jatuh ke bumi. Emak say menghantar helikopter itu ke Genting Highlands. Bila dia balik ke tempat kejadian, dia terus memukul pemandu lori itu dengan beg tangannya sambil memarahi pemandu lori itu di dalam bahasa Inggeris.

Pemandu lori itu tidak dapat menjawab sebab emak saya cakap orang putih. Lalu pemandu lori itu mati. Tidak lama kemudian kereta polis pun sampai. Dia membuat lapuran ke ibu pejabatnya tentang kemalangan ngeri itu. Semua anggota polis di pejabat polis itu terperanjat lalu mati. Orang ramai mengerumuni tempat kejadian kerana ingin mengetahui apa yang telah terjadi. Polis yang bertugas cuba menyuraikan orang ramai lalu dia menjerit menggunakan pembesar suara. Orang ramai terperanjat dan semuanya mati.

Selepas itu emak saya mengajak saya ke pasar untuk mengelak lebih ramai lagi yang akan mati. Di pasar, emak saya menceritakan kejadian itu kepada penjual daging. Penjual daging dan peniaga-peniaga berhampiran yang mendengar cerita itu semuanya terkejut dan mati. Saya dan emak saya terus berlari balik ke rumah. Kerana terlalu penat sebaik saja sampai di rumah kami pun mati. Itulah kemalangan yang paling ngeri yang pernah saya lihat sebelum saya mati.



Like I said, it was written by a prodigal 10 year old. But hey, you gotta give the kid some credit for his imagination.
What-your pants are wet?

Bound and Gagged Against My Will

Never EVER underestimate the power of a clingy seven year-old. You will be bound, gagged and forced to watch:
Some annoying tween singing about her first day in school
The Nick Jonas Show
Hannah Montana's music videos
Jesse McCartney's music videos

Unless you've experienced all of the above, you. Have. No. Idea. What. I've. Gone. Through.

*giggle*

I'm STILL holding on to my fantasy of being with Matthew Bellamy and making lots of babies together. Only thing is, I will get my tubes tied, tell him I'm very fertile, and begin our fruitless quest for trying for kids. After all:

If at first you don't succeed: Try, try again.

Now, now...

Look readers, if you're going to pick a fight with your parents, do it properly. Pick a good topic to argue about, like maybe why you can't go out or something. Whatever it is, NEVER EVER fight over why you don't like tong sui and absolutely refuse to eat it. It ain't cool like that.

Ughh

Channel surfing one day, I came across Hitz.tv. And they were showing the music video for 'Your Love Is A Lie'. The music video got me thinking, "I CAN'T BELIEVE I LIKED SIMPLE PLAN."

What-no...Seriously?

You're welcome to my house anytime, but be forewarned. In my house, clothes are known to disappear for an extended period of time and then mysteriously appear in the most unexpected places...or sometimes not appear at all...Mysterious...

No Comment...

Just yesterday, I called McDonald's to make a home delivery. I ordered a nice Prosperity Burger. The only thing that spoiled my order was, "Is there anything else you would like to order, sir?"